Remember when you were nineteen years old? All of us were at a different place. Some of us, maybe, were in the party phase, drinking with friends and staying up all night. Some of us were already working hard in a blue-collar job, trying to make it on our own for the first time. Some of us were studying for college exams and deciding what we wanted to be when we grew up. I started early…at nineteen I was already engaged, working at a college degree that I would never get, looking for the next step in my life. Wherever you were, chances are that at nineteen, you were learning huge lessons, full of hope and dreams and a few disillusions about what life is about. You were young and confident and scared and excited about the many years you had ahead of you to make something happen. To live your life. To build your dreams.
Think about it. Nineteen. Where were you? What were you doing? Just think about it for a second.
A few days ago, we received word that the remains of Private Byron Fouty, an Army soldier from here in Michigan who had been missing in Iraq since March 12, 2007, were found. Maybe you heard about it on the news. But then again, maybe you didn’t. It was barely mentioned on some local channels. One little blurb about a hero found and they were on to news of the latest Hollywood marriage. It seems so strange. Here was this soldier…this kid…out doing his job one day, wearing his camouflage and boots, talking to his buddies, fighting for his country, carrying a gun and wearing body armour in the dirty streets of Iraq, and he was never heard from again. Gone. Lost. Missing. He was nineteen. Nineteen!
We have gotten to know some of Byron’s family since this horrible event occurred fourteen months ago, and have prayed and worried and wondered alongside them. My husband Sarge is involved with them in an official military capacity and has had the chance to learn about this young soldier, to see pictures and hear stories about his childhood and to meet all the friends and family that he left behind. At some point soon, we will go to a memorial or a funeral and hear even more about Byron…who he was and what his family will miss about him and why they are so proud.
And I will cry. I will cry for the parents who will never see their son fulfill his dreams. I will cry for the nephew who will never meet his uncle. I will cry for the friends who will never hang out with him again, laughing and making memories. I will cry for all the people who never got to tell Byron how much he meant to them. But most of all, I will cry for that nineteen year old who was full of hope and dreams and big things to come. I will cry for the nineteen year old who had the courage to fight in a war that most people don’t support, and who gave his life so that they can hold that opinion openly. I will cry for a life cut short. I will cry for the man that will never be.
He may have been only nineteen, but he did more with his life than many of us ever will. Thank you, Byron.
Sports Mama said,
July 14, 2008 at 2:37 am
This was a beautiful tribute. My baby brother joined the Navy at 17, just a couple of weeks before his 18th birthday. By the time he turned 19, he had already served 10 months overseas on his ship when this whole thing started.
I thank God every day that there are boys like Byron and my brother. Boys who WILLING make the CHOICE to serve in this capacity.
BusyDad said,
July 14, 2008 at 10:09 am
There is no one I respect more than someone willing to risk his/her life to protect ours in the military. You can argue “it’s a job” but really, there are so many other “jobs” out there that don’t entail being separated from your loved ones and being thrown into the chaos that is war. Whether I support the war itself is irrelevant. Our soldiers’ willingness to be there deserves my utmost respect. And I cannot even imagine what this young man’s family is going through right now. My thoughts are with them.
Ruth said,
July 14, 2008 at 10:13 am
My nephew Ken (my niece’s husband) is returning from Iraq this week. He’s been there for maybe 18 months (I can’t remember), and I know he’s happy to be returning back home. He’s only 19 or 20 years old. I can’t imagine the pain his parents and siblings would endure if he was fatally wounded there. I can’t really even imagine how I would feel, personally knowing someone who died fighting this war. This war, like you said, that so many people openly bash. It used to bother me a little, but thinking of it in the eyes of the “what if” I knew Byron… that makes me feel anger about all the negative talk! I know people don’t support it. That’s fine. But voicing how stupid & a waste of time it is, while people we know are there fighting & dying… it just leaves a really bad taste in my mouth. Makes me feel like they’re not acknowledging the soldiers, that they’re just looking at the politics of it all.
Alison said,
July 14, 2008 at 10:41 am
I echo your thanks.
Thank you Byron.
I cry each time I hear a story like this. I cry when I hear the happy stories of soldiers coming home. I cry because the job that they are doing is for me and my kids and I try to remember that sacrifice.
Thank you.
Latte Mommy said,
July 14, 2008 at 11:57 am
I find it interesting that despite (or perhaps because of) all the technology we have today, all the embedded reporters, all the instantaneous news, we (both Canadians and Americans) feel so removed from this war. We hear so often about lives being lost that we have become cold to the casualties of war. Dead soldiers become just another number in a tally.
Thank you for reminding us of the human face of this war. For reminding us that many of those we are losing are at the prime of their lives. That the real casualty of war is the loss of all that potential.
Mrs. Staff Sergeant said,
July 14, 2008 at 12:59 pm
What a tragedy. Please tell his family that there are many of us out there that are so very thankful for their sacrifice.
Jenn @ Juggling Life said,
July 14, 2008 at 2:00 pm
I am crying now.
Jaina said,
July 14, 2008 at 5:52 pm
When you see his family, tell them thank you from me, and give them a hug.
Mrs. Kitty said,
July 14, 2008 at 8:10 pm
Thank you Byron for your bravery and honor. I hope the Lord blesses your remaining family.
I feel like crying…..
lunanik said,
July 14, 2008 at 9:18 pm
What a shame. Nineteen. So young, so much ahead of him. I feel so deeply for his family’s lose. I can’t even imagine the pain they are feeling.
Chuck said,
July 14, 2008 at 11:07 pm
These tributes, while absolutely necessary, always break my heart. Byron is one of the reasons I try to never take for granted the privileged life we live here in the states.
My heart goes out to the Fouty family. Thank you Byron and thank you Bunchy.
LaskiGal said,
July 15, 2008 at 1:00 am
A beautiful, albeit sad, tribute. This post reminds us that there is still a war going on and that there are still brothers, sisters, mothers, fathers, sons, and daughters fighting single every day–whether we hear about it on the news or not.
He and his family are in my prayers.
Mozi Esme's Mommy said,
July 15, 2008 at 5:44 pm
Great tribute . . .
April said,
July 19, 2008 at 12:24 pm
This post was much needed. Byron and his family will be in my thoughts.
so grateful to be Mormon said,
July 23, 2008 at 3:53 pm
sweet post. thank you, kathleen